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Roman Vomit Collectors

Everyone knows how extravagant and decadent Roman banquets could be. There were multiple courses and loads of wine to be consumed and the feasting lasted all night. But how did these people manage to eat non-stop for so long? Well, according to Seneca, the Romans vomited so they could eat and they ate so they could vomit. Apparently, according to Cicero, Julius Caesar escaped an assassination attempt because he felt like vomiting after dinner. Instead of going to the latrine to do the deed, where his assassins were waiting in anticipation of this, he decided to vomit in his bedroom (yuk!) and so missed getting bumped off on that occasion... However, most Romans didn't feel it was necessary to leave the dining room in order to vomit. For this reason, they usually had bowls lying around, especially for this purpose, but other times they would just bend over and puke all over the floor. Who would think that there was a slave whose 'job description' was to crawl around

Weddings in the 1200s

Have you ever wondered why some churches have such lovely porches? It's almost as if they were made for people to stand under. Well, you wouldn't be far from the truth on that assumption. In the 1200s weddings did not take place inside the church but at the church door, hence the lovely porches so the people attending the wedding could shelter if it rained. So, at the door of the churh, the happy groom would give his wife to be something symbolic, such as a knife. At the end of this doorstep ceremony, the couple were pronounced man and wife and were free to proceed into the church, prostrate themselves at the altar, followed by the wedding party, and hear mass. While prostrated, the altar cloth would be held over the newlyweds. At the point when they received communion, the husband would give the priest a kiss, the kiss of peace , and only after that would he give his glowing bride a kiss. (Note the bride did not have to kiss the priest). According to the Church in those

Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Maybe people who saw the film "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" will know the story of Eloise and Abelard, whose love affair in the late middle ages was as tragic as it was passionate. The title of the film comes from a poem by Alexander Pope, entitled "Eloise to Abelard" . Eloise was an extremely clever young woman of 18 when she met Peter Abelard, who was 51. Abelard was a philosopher and priest and Eloise's uncle had arranged for him to be her tutor. From the moment the two met they fell madly in love. They secretly got married and managed to keep their secret very well until Eloise got pregnant and her uncle found out. Furious at this, Eloise's uncle had Abelard hunted down and castrated. After this the two lovers were not allowed to meet again. Eloise was sent off to be a nun and Abelard, who had now lost his official position in the church, was forced to retire in a monastery. They exchanged letters for the rest of their lives, but never met aga

Vespasian, the Sensible Emperor (A.D. 69-79)

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Vespasian was born Titus Flavius Vespasianus on 17th November of A.D. 9. He was a practical leader who gave Rome some much needed stability. His father was a banker and was often away froim home on business, taking Vespasian's mother with him as well. As a result of this he was pretty much brought up by his grandmother, Tertulla. As soon as he was legally of age and had received the toga virilis Vespasian embarked on his career, occupying various positions in public office. Around this time he married Flavia Domitilla, an ex mistress of an African knight. The marriage went well and they had three children together, out of which two, Titus and Domitian were to be future Emperors. However, before he had got married, Vespasian had started a passionate affair with a young freedwoman (ex-slave) by the name of Antonia Caenis. She had been secretary to Antonia, the mother of the Emperor Claudius and that must have been how they met. Now, there is no evidence that he and Caenis carried on

Fleas & Hygiene in Anglo-Saxon Britain

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In Anglo-Saxon England, around the year 1000 A.D., fleas were as much a problem as they had ever been. There were various suggestions on how to get rid of them, of which some of the most amusing were to lock the flea-ridden clothes of the person inside a chest or to put sheepskins around the infested bed. The fleas would hopefully jump onto the whitish sheepskin and thus allow the tormented person to squish them to death. As with the Elizabethans, the anglo-Saxons didn't really believe in washing their bodies much. In fact, monks were said to have a maximum of five baths a year, and that was considered to be overdoing it. It appears that at least one commentator of the time may have cottoned on to something when he observed that the Danish habit of bathing and combing the hair every Saturday seemed to score the Danish men points with the women. Of course, there was no concept of hygiene as we know it. A document of the time advises that if some food fell off your plate by accident,

Washing and Waking Up

People in the past didn't wash very much. In fact, they hardly washed at all. A book from 1547 tells us all about the process of getting up in the morning : "When you be out of your bed stretch forth your legs and arms and your body, cough and spit, and then go to your stool...after you have evacuated your body and trussed your points combe your head...and wash your hands and wrists, your face and eyes and your teeth with cold water". Note that there is no mention of washing the body, even the point of evacuation. Deodorants seem to have been used though, as if that would solve the problem of a smelling body! The roote of fleur de lys, "taketh away the strong savour coming from the armholes". Queen Elizabeth took around portable lavatories with her, called 'close stools', when she went for visits to the countryside. These would be conveniently placed in a carriage specially provided for her. In 1565 she ordered "four close stools covered w

Vitellius the Glutton

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The Roman Emperor Vitellius (69 A.D.) was best known for his gluttony. His reign was incredibly short-lived as it lasted for little over a year. He was born Aulus Vitellius, in 15 A.D, to Lucius Vitellius, one of the most succesful public figures of the time, and Sestilia. According to Suetonius, his horoscope was omminus and this terrified his parents, who said they would do their best to keep their son away from public office. However, they did not succeed in their intent. Young Vitellius spent his early youth in Capri, in the company of Tiberius's homosexual prostitutes and it is said that he got his father a big promotion by being very "nice" to the Emperor. Through flattery, cunning and manipulation, Vitellius managed to work his way up the Imperial ladder and held a variety of positions in public office. His first wife was a woman called Petroniana, and he had a son with her, who was allegedly born blind in one eye. It is said that Vitellius killed the boy shortly a

Cess-pits and Chamber Pots

Cess-pits existed in London for many centuries, from medieval times onwards. Thankfuly they do not exist now. A cess-pit was a chamber in which sewage from each individual house was 'stored' until it was emptied. This task was for the so called 'night-soil men' to do. As disgusting as this job was, it could also be dangerous, as when in 1326 a certain Richard the Raker fell into his cess-pit and drowned "monstrously in his own excrement" while he was attempting to empty it. By the 16th century a new cess-pit related job was invented, that of the 'saltpetre man'. These men extracted nitrates from excrement, so it could be used to make gunpowder. Saltpetre men had a licence from the king to enter into anyone's house at any time and remove the sewage-ridden earth of the cess-pit. In October 1660, Samuel Pepys records in his diary: "Going down to my cellar...I put my feet into a great heap of turds, by which I find that Mr. Turner's house of

Julius Caesar on the Britons

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Julius Caesar In 54 B.C Julius Caesar invaded Britain for a second time. He had invaded the year before but had been forced to withdraw. Problems in Gaul however forced him to retreat again. Britain was finally colonized by the Romans in A.D 43 under the reign of Claudius. Despite all these ups and downs though, Julius Caesar managed to make some interesting observations on how the locals lived. Here is what he had to say about their appearance, clothing and familly bliss: "Most of the tribes in the interior do not grow corn but live on milk and meat and wear skins. All the Britons dye their bodies with woad, which produces a blue colour, and this gives them a more terrifying appearance in battle. They wear their hair long and shave the whole of their bodies, except the head and the upper lip. Wives are shared between groups of ten or twelve men, especially between brothers and between fathers and sons, but the offspring of these unions are counted as the children of the man with

Theodora (A.D. 500-548): The Whore who Became Empress

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Theodora (mosaic from Ravenna, Italy) Theodora was the daughter of a Byzantine bear-tamer at the Hippodrome (the Byzantine version of the Roman arena). Her father died when she was little, leaving behind a wife, Theodora and her two sisters Comito and Anastasia. The widow re-married but things did not improve for them financialy. As soon as the girls were old enough she put her daughters on the stage, which in those days was a profession which inevitably led to prostitution. The eldest, Comito was already an accomplished courtesan by the time Theodora started to assist her. It was not too long until she too became a prostitute. She was infimous. As she could not play any musical instruments or dance, according to Procopius, she "merely sold her attractions to anyone who came along, putting her whole body at his disposal" . She would also perform outrageous acts on stage, which only added to her notoriety. She was said to be given to "unlimited self-indulgence. Often she